Why do you want to be born now, Jumby?

There's always that one film that you come back from watching, and it's absolutely nothing like what you had thought it would be. Whether it's something like Audition that sounds like some romantic drama about a guy who meets a girl with it would appear some sort of troubled life which then turns out to be a film whch makes you wince and want to lock the door during the final few scenes, or something like Hidden which sounds like a decent thriller only to be very disappointed at the lack of anything ever happening. Then a film like The Unborn comes along which makes promises of being your generic horror film about some ghosts haunting some useless screaming teenage girl, which it is on one level. On another level, no other horror film has had me gasping for breath rolling around in my seat trying to laugh into my jumper for fear of disturbing the other people in the theatre (although in this case there were only two others with my mate and me, at the back from which a faint hint of weed could be smelt...) and being thrown out. I really wanted to see how the film ended and what becomes of the upside-down-headed dog, who wears a mask. Take a load of horror cliches, overdo the drama (or lack thereof), hit a child with your car and then say to him "fuck off, you little shit" and you have something which was probably much funnier than the film we were originally going to see; Lesbian Vampire Killers. Apparently, demon dogs can be scared away by having Gary Oldman shout "Get outta here!" at it. Makes you wonder why they bothered having an entire excorcism.